Panic

It has taken me a week to blog about this…and I still shake every time I think about it. I have been this terrified once before, but I wasn’t by myself. I lost Peyton when he was 2, at the baseball field. I had several friends help me find him…he needed to go to the bathroom and he went to the truck (he had a potty seat in the back)

This time, I was alone….

I went out to get the mail. Elisabeth was inside. I came in, closed the door and sat down to look through the mail. I heard her call Mama…it sounded really distant. I opened the back door thinking she went outside through the garage door looking for me and went into the back yard. I started calling for her and she didn’t answer. I ran around the outside calling for her, getting more and more panicked. I came back inside and I looked in the bedrooms, bathrooms, game room, everywhere for her…calling her name. I ran back outside screaming her name…no answer. It must have only been a couple of minutes…but it felt like forever.

I ran back in screaming, crying, panicked…..I was thinking should I call Ken or call 911….I ended up calling 911 and I heard her call me. I hung up (thought before it connected) and ran into our bedroom…thinking she was hiding some where in either Ken’s closet or mine and I had just missed her. She was in her bed…she was crying because I was crying. I grabbed her and was just sobbing.

911 called back and I told the dispatcher that I thought my daughter was lost, but she was just hiding and everything was okay.

Apparently, she was hiding under the blankets on my bed and when she heard me screaming…because I was screaming loud…she ran and got on her bed and started crying.

I am still shaking…my heart is still racing. I have never been more terrified than in those 3 or 4 minutes. Ken called me and I started crying all over again.

My heart still races when I think of the panic, the desperation I felt, the terror I felt when I thought my baby girl was gone. I waited so long for this girlie girl. I know God gave her to me for some special reason. I couldn’t imagine losing her….I couldn’t imagine losing my boys.

I have to stop here, I am about to cry again.

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About Jamie

I am the mom of 3 beautiful children and one fabulous husband. I have 2 boys and 1 very spoiled little girl. What is even more spectacular, I get to stay home and take care of these great people!! Life is pretty darn good and I am truly blessed!
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